Friday, December 14, 2012

Porcupine's Picks

I love Thanksgiving without reservation. Christmas is more of a mixed bag for me. Not that I don't like it, I do. I just wish there were a whole lot less of it. I mean, I don't know anyone who has a Thanksgiving dinner the week before, or the day after. Maybe that happens but not in my world.

But right about this time every year, I start feeling like Christmas will never end. And it hasn't even started yet. And there it is.

So, if you're feeling as I am, or if you just need a laugh, here are some of my Christmas favorites: five songs and a video that, if they don't exactly put me in the proper Christmas spirit, at least help put a grin back on my face so I can fake it for one more gathering.


I'm Gettin' Nuttin' For Christmas: The first song I was aware of written specifically for us naughty children.

Run, Rudolph, Run: The definitive version, by Mr. Keith Richards. Nothing says Christmas like Keith: that rough-but-right voice and Telecaster turned up to brain damage? Can I get an Amen? I said can I get an Amen?

Father Christmas: A favorite of city kids everywhere. Save all your toys for the little rich boys.

Fairytale of New York: It was Christmas Eve in the drunk tank - and it just gets better. Happy Christmas yer arse!

It has come to my attention that some of you have never heard Mr Mojo's Christmas, by The Wise Men. This is completely unacceptable. If you've never heard this, you must click now. In fact, if you click only one link from this post, it must be THIS ONE. Really. If you don't laugh there's something wrong with you. Seek professional help.

I will admit, privately, that I have a soft spot for Rudolph and the Misfit Toys. I will even admit (whisper it quietly) that I own a stuffed Spotted Elephant. I will even go so far as to admit that I once watched the entire show just to attempt to settle with a friend of mine the question of what was misfit about the doll. So there's that.

Even so, here is what I consider to be a true Christmas masterpiece: Raging Rudolph, from MAD-TV. If you've never seen this... well, I won't spoil it. Just remember, kids, the moral of the story is "Keep your freakin' mouth shut!"


And there you have it: some of my personal Christmas favorites for when the mood fails me. I hope you enjoy them and, if not, at least we've increased our level of intimacy. There's always that. So until next time, I remain

Very Truly Yours,