It was another one of those nights. I dreamt I was being harassed by small children and woke to find it true. Things went downhill from there. I set out a coffee cup and a sippy cup. I poured my morning brew, then cleverly added apple juice to it. Oops.
I wondered if it was still drinkable. It wasn't.
I tried again, paying closer attention to which bottle I chose from the refrigerator.
I left my three year-old in the care of PBS and went to spend some time alone with my thoughts.
I wish I had just watched Clifford instead.
Seven out of ten customers who switched to Allstate saved money.
What happened with the other three?
Wouldn't you think guys named Dick would try a little harder ?
Why on earth is this song stuck in my head?
My jar of peanuts reads: Warning! Contains Peanuts.
So does the peanut butter.
The jar of almonds? Contains Almonds. Good to know.
The milk jug doesn't warn me it contains milk. Is someone slacking?
Take-out coffee cups warn me that the beverage is hot.
My lawnmower suggests I keep my hands and feet away from the vicious, ugly blade. Sounds like a plan.
2-Ton Epoxy is not to be taken internally. Don't forget, now.
Am I missing something here?
Three cups later I opened my other eye.
I need to ask my doctor if Lunesta is right for me. Or something.
Very Truly Yours,