Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Worms



Old Grave stone


It's hard to beat The Hearse Song for Hallowe'en fun. Yet my sons and I have always thought it far too short. Why leave the grossness to just a verse or two? Last year, in the true folk tradition, I decided to do some research and compile what I believe to be the definitive version. After much reading and listening, this is what I came up with and how we sing it today. Enjoy.


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The Hearse Song


If you ever see a funeral go by
Remember you may be the next to die
They'll wrap you up in a great white sheet
And bury you about six feet deep

The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out
The ones that crawl in are lean and thin
The ones that crawl out are fat and stout
Your eyes fall in and your teeth fall out
Your brains come tumbling down your snout
Be merry, my friends, be merry...

They'll put you in a big black box
And cover you up with dirt and rocks
All goes well for about a week
But then your coffin begins to leak

The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out
The ones that crawl in are lean and thin
The ones that crawl out are fat and stout
Your eyes fall in and your teeth fall out
Your brains come tumbling down your snout
Be merry, my friends, be merry...

The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out
The worms play pinochle on your snout
They bring their friends and relatives too
And then they'll make a mess of you

The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out
The ones that crawl in are lean and thin
The ones that crawl out are fat and stout
Your eyes fall in and your teeth fall out
Your brains come tumbling down your snout
Be merry, my friends, be merry...

They'll eat your eyes, they'll eat your nose
They'll eat the jelly between your toes
Your stomach turns to a slimy green
And pus squirts out like whipping cream

The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out
The ones that crawl in are lean and thin
The ones that crawl out are fat and stout
Your eyes fall in and your teeth fall out
Your brains come tumbling down your snout
Be merry, my friends, be merry...

The worms crawl out, the worms crawl in
The worms crawl over your mouth and chin
One little guy, who was so sly
Crawled up your nose and out your eye

The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out
The ones that crawl in are lean and thin
The ones that crawl out are fat and stout
Your eyes fall in and your teeth fall out
Your brains come tumbling down your snout
Be merry, my friends, be merry...

Your hair falls out, your teeth decay
Your brain turns to marble and rolls away
You'll spread your guts on a piece of bread
And that's what you'll eat when you are dead

The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out
The ones that crawl in are lean and thin
The ones that crawl out are fat and stout
Your eyes fall in and your teeth fall out
Your brains come tumbling down your snout
Be merry, my friends, be merry...

And when they're done there is no doubt
They've gobbled you up from the inside out
And when your bones begin to rot
The worms are there but you are not

The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out
The ones that crawl in are lean and thin
The ones that crawl out are fat and stout
Your eyes fall in and your teeth fall out
Your brains come tumbling down your snout
Be merry, my friends, be merry...


***************


A Happy Hallowe'en to You and Yours.
Be merry.


Cricket and Porcupine




14 comments:

Bossy Betty said...

One of my favorites! Believe it or not, I sing a portion of this song in my class every year when we study Marvell's poem. "To His Coy Mistress."

Classic lyrics!

Cricket said...

Betty - An interesting prologue, I'd think.

The grave's a fine and private place,
But none, I think, do there embrace.


Heh, heh.

CiCi said...

My cousin would sing that to us younger cousins and make us so nervous.

Joanna Jenkins said...

How did I no know this song???
Happy Halloween

lime said...

oh i see you and i are cut from similar cloth when it comes to teaching the kids icky things. i must say i'd not heard this song before but i do like it! thanks :)

Hilary said...

You just sent me back about.. too many years. We used to sing:

Don't you laugh when a hearse goes by for you may be the next to die.

The worms crawl in. The worms crawl out. They crawl into your ears and come out of your mouth.

;)

Unknown said...

You just took me back decades (unlike Hilary who is way too young) and I love the way you've enhanced an old standby.

Suldog said...

I see that certain verses no longer apply to me. I don't have any teeth left and most of my hair is already gone. Woo-Hoo! I'm a lucky son of a gun!

Andy said...

Nyuk!

Cricket, I read this the other day, and have been trying to think of a clever comment ever since.

It is frustrating to lack a quick wit. Trust me, it is. One consolation, though...the same worms will get the sharp, and funny folks that get me!

Pearl said...

:-) Highly enjoyable!

The classics never fail...

Pearl

Land of shimp said...

Hahahaha! Marvelous, Cricket. Happy Halloween to you and yours.

From Ghosties, and Ghoulies and Long Legged Beasties and Things that Go Bump in the Night, Good Lord Preserve Us!

ds said...

"The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out..." but I never knew till now where that came from. Thanks, I think ;)

My fave has always begun "I was working in the lab late one night, when my eyes beheld an eerie sight..."

Be merry, my friend, be merry...
Happy Halloween!

Anonymous said...

Ah, thank you for the memories! I taught this to my kids and the whole Cub Scout Pack. Always one of my absolute favorites!

Ananda girl said...

Oh I LOVE it! Big grins.